Mid April Musings

“That the powerful play goes on and you may contribute a verse”

Walt Whitman

So, here’s what I did today! I woke up in the morning feeling absolutely gloomy! Now, if someone’s really upset, gloomy and not herself/ himself, the first thing that comes to most people’s minds is heartbreak! Poor John got dumped by Taylor; Oh, poor Ben, Devi doesn’t realise he’s perfect for her! But, people, to be brutally honest; (and it might seem like an exaggeration to some and even if it is, bear with me, here and no I’m not apologizing here😂! ) when you find a girl feeling this way, the most common etiology is her menstruation! But yes, you’ve got to be careful with your timing, fellas! Ask a girl if she’s feeling gloomy because of her menses when she’s menstruating, she’d feel so cared for! And ask her if she’s feeling gloomy and irritated because of menses when she’s not, oh dear, buckle up, because you’ve just invited yourself into a debate party! Honestly, I’m a person who feels relieved when she feels gloomy during menses because that’s the most uncomplicated reason for my sadness then and it spares me a lot of time that I’d otherwise be spending on overthinking about my mental health! Duh! Um anyways, so, here’s something that I realised just yesterday! That during menses, I tend to have this feminine urge to show my uterus that she doesn’t own me, I own her! And that makes me a fairly productive person, really! But no, I can’t afford to have to menstruate every day to stay productive! So, I’d never make that deal even if I could! Now, enough of the menstruation talk, because this post was not meant to be on menstruation at all! But, I’d surely come up with a post on it pretty soon, we can all rant about it together, girls!

Anyways, we all have different pictures of the same world we’re living in! And we’re living in the same world but we all have our own fences, our own neighbourhoods, our own safe places! And we grow, our experiences come with more diversity, our minds change, our lives change, our opinions change, our pictures of the same world change again! As a child I remember, I believed the world to be a beautiful place, filled with hope right to the brink if we could look for it. Because I was always taught to believe in this! But isn’t there a difference between truly believing in something and believing in something because you always saw it as a fact?! And you can’t be sure you truly believe in something till you have experienced it yourself. You can only tell someone (and also mean it, really) it’s gonna be okay if you’ve overcome something like that.
Now, how I see it is that the world is actually a wrecked place, which can’t ever be completely mended because then it’s gonna collapse! Because with existence comes flaws, with existence comes work, with existence comes pain and also with existence comes hope. What doesn’t come with existence is happiness and perfection. Because then, what’s the point of living, eh?! The Creator’s like, “What are ya’ll gonna do, if I give you all that you think you truly need- happiness, eh?!” The truth is we don’t know if it’s gonna be better or worse, if it’s gonna work out for us or not. But, that’s exactly how life is! Unpredictable! Sometimes, like today, I wonder what’s the whole point of living, really?! What’s one thing that we can truly cling to?! Because, hey, we’re promised nothing! But with no promises comes no boundaries! Because life doesn’t come with promises and reassurances, we learn to take responsibility for our own decisions and actions, it’s because of this that we have a shot on being more than what we already are, it’s because of this that we find love to cling on to, it’s because of this that we care for people, it’s because of this that people can empathize and be kind, it’s because of this that we try to seize the day and live in the moment! I know, it’s because of this that we feel so miserable too, but pain is inevitable. That’s the rule. And so if we want to be happy in this world, we need to create happiness and never apologize for it! And, anyways, if I were promised a hundred years, I’d have wasted 99 years thinking I have got time and cried throughout the hundredth year regretting my life! And if I were promised happiness, I’d never grow and the world would come to an end! Sounds more awful, doesn’t it?!

Truly all that we have some control over, is now! And every “now” is different, it doesn’t need to be productive, it doesn’t need to be happy or hopeful or optimistic to be counted! It just has to be yours!

P.S: I have already mentioned my proclivity for shifting my focus from one loci to another in my mind and writing space! Thanks for bearing with me because I know if you’re reading this, you’ve read the whole post!

See ya, guys!
Till then and always,
Carpe Diem!